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 Corrupt a Wish

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StephenColbert
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PostSubject: Corrupt a Wish    Fri Jul 06, 2012 12:02 pm

Because wynut.
Say wish, corrupt wish and all that.

I wish I had a chance to use "wynut" in an actual thread about pokemon.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Fri Jul 06, 2012 11:32 pm

Granted, but the only way you can use it is in a completely pointless and forced way, and everyone hates you for it.

I wish I had lots of money.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Sat Jul 07, 2012 12:03 am

granted, but someone steals all of it and kills you

I wish I was better at FPS's
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Sat Jul 07, 2012 11:38 am

Granted, but everyone is still better than you.

I wish it wasn't so god damned hot.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Sat Jul 07, 2012 12:15 pm

Granted, but now It's sub-zero and you become a Capsicle.

I wish I could choose when to feel pain. ;D
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Sat Jul 07, 2012 3:30 pm

Granted, but you break your leg and don't notice for three days.

I wish I had the powers to manipulate time and space.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Sat Jul 07, 2012 4:09 pm

granted but you a few paradoxes and destroy the universe

I wish you hadn't destroyed the universe
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Sat Jul 07, 2012 11:35 pm

Granted, but now Earth can continue in its inevitable plunge into chaos and anarchy, chiefly due to a global thermonuclear war and the massive famine that ensued.

I wish I hadn't used my Masterball on Groudon.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Sun Jul 08, 2012 12:02 am

granted, but you used it on a zigzagoon

I wish my internet didn't constantly fail
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Sun Jul 08, 2012 12:38 am

Granted, but it is now constantly slow.

I wish I wish I was a fish.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Sun Jul 08, 2012 12:48 am

Granted, you are a fish. And now you're dinner.

I wish I could even sometimes go as far as.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Sun Jul 08, 2012 8:27 am

Granted, but you decide not to even go want to do more like.

I wish my jimmies remained unrustled.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Sun Jul 08, 2012 11:41 am

granted, but your jimmies are so unrustled that the unrustled-ness of your jimmies begins to rustle you jimmies

I wish I managed to type that granted section without having to fix a ton of typos


Last edited by primeAlternative on Sun Jul 08, 2012 11:42 am; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : I missed a typo)
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Sun Jul 08, 2012 1:15 pm

Granted, but you still made some, and therefore your jimmies are still rustled.

I wish I had some jimmies for my ice cream.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Sun Jul 08, 2012 9:03 pm

Granted, but those jimmies are replaced with gorilla munch cereal.

I wish that Roller Coaster Day wasn't so far away.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Sun Jul 08, 2012 9:39 pm

granted, but its only one day sooner and the time changing rustles your jimmies

I wish I could think of something interesting to do right now
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Sun Jul 08, 2012 11:38 pm

Granted, but you decide to lick an electrical outlet.

I wish Summer didn't fly by so fast.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Mon Jul 09, 2012 12:17 am

granted but you have to go to summer school

I wish I could fix my sleep schedule
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Mon Jul 09, 2012 12:19 pm

Granted, but now you're asleep when everyone else is awake because they adjusted their sleep schedule because they hate you.

I wish that I had a useless superpower.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Mon Jul 09, 2012 12:30 pm

granted, you now have to power to appear to be Bruce Wayne when you are actually Batman

I wish my zelda timeline thing didnt take me an hour to write
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Mon Jul 09, 2012 2:37 pm

granted, but you were careless and made over 9000 grammatical errors.

I wish I could eat a cheeseburger every night for a year.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Mon Jul 09, 2012 5:23 pm

Granted, but you die of a heart attack after a few months.

I wish brussel(sp?) sprouts didn't take so long to cook. Alternatively, that they were tasty.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Mon Jul 09, 2012 8:48 pm

Granted, but you get cancer from the microwave.

I wish I wan an Oscar Meyer Wiener.

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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Mon Jul 09, 2012 10:15 pm

Granted, but you have no limbs, so you resort to bending over (cooked hotdogs are flexible) and eating your body.






I wish I could speak a foreign language sufficiently.
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PostSubject: Re: Corrupt a Wish    Tue Jul 10, 2012 10:22 pm

Granted, but it's a dead language and it's not even useful any other time.

I wish I had infinite money.
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